I know It has been a while since I wrote something, it has been a
busy and strange couple of years.
I got engaged in the 1st of march 2013, my lovely husband
got down on one knee in front of me with a beautiful engagement ring
behind the Disney castle at Disney World Florida. I never thought I
would have a boyfriend let alone be proposed to, so it took me a
while to speak because of the shock and emotions I was feeling, there
was no doubt in my mind that I loved Conal and would say Yes I just
couldn't believe what was happening.
A lovely girl at the park came over after I said Yes and offered to
email me the pictures she had taken of the event which I am so
grateful for they are beautiful and are pride of place on our wall.
Also right after I said yes, a husband and wife came over and the man
told us he is a pastor and he would like to congratulate us both and
wish us all the luck in the world. What popped through my head was I
have only just said yes, I don't want to marry him right at this
moment. We were then invited into Cinderella's castle to be given
just engaged badges and have pixie dust sprinkled on our heads.
We were engaged for 2 year and were married on August 9th
2015 at the Clandeboye Lodge in Bangor Northern Ireland. It was a
beautiful day and neither Conal or I were nervous about getting
married, I was emotional because it felt like I was leaving my family
but I wasn't and I know that now, our families are both so welcoming
to each other.
During the 2 years prior to the wedding I lived and worked in
northern Ireland and Conal lived in Blackpool, We went on Holiday to
Toronto and went to comic cons in London and Toronto we saw each
other as much as we could and we were and still are very much in love
and there is no doubt that we make each other very happy.
That said in 2014 I suffered from a breakdown and severe depression
and if it was not for my family, Conal and his family, my friends and
the doctors I don't want to think about what could have happened, I
know what nearly happened and I hate the fact I put everyone through
this, but I have learned depression is a dark beast in your head that
tries to control you and you have to fight it everyday and it is a
beast I am still fighting and some days are better then others.
I left my Job in Northern Ireland as that was the main cause of my
depression and I was having trouble working there even when I tried
to go back when my therapist told me not to. Thankfully I had been
given a job with the civil Service in the UK and was able to move
over to live with Conal in Blackpool prior to the wedding and work in
Southport. The commute is actually quite relaxing and I have got used
to the shifts, I'm so much happier but I still fight the beast in my
head.
Because I moved over to the UK in May 2015 we were unable to have a
proper Honeymoon We had a couple of days in Belfast after the wedding
before I had to go back to work. So we have planned a 2 week trip to
Florida in 2016 which was not our original intention but it is
actually a perfect way to celebrate or relationship as it was in
Florida that Conal proposed and we both love the movies and rides at
Disney and Universal.
2016 is going to be a great Year and we will be just as happy as we
have been in the 4 years we have been together so far.
I will write more film reviews and work on my story ideas too. I'm
not just saying this because of the New Year, I now feel strong
enough to go back to this as it is something that makes me happy and
I love doing, but over the past year I have found it hard to get
motivation to write which is another side effect of depression, you
don't have the motivation to do anything all you want is to be on
your own and do nothing or not to be part of this world at all.
I think that if people were educated on Depression and not
embarrassed about it perhaps people would get the help they need
sooner and not let the Beast win.
But on a lighter note lets all make 2016 a brilliant year and besides
we are now in the future beyond Back to the Future 2.
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